New Holiday Excuses for not coming over for Thanksgiving

Here are a list of excuses you may have heard or used to get out of going somewhere for Thanksgiving.
1-I want to stay home by myself and reflect on the year.
2-I hurt myself and I am too hopped up on percoset/vikaden/codine/crack cocaine/etc to be social.
3-So and so wasn't invited, so I will stay home with them.  Don't want them to be alone on a holiday!
4-You live too far away, and the kids can't sit long enough to handle the ride.
5-My (insert name here) only eats my cooking.
6- The kids don't really like turkey and the sides.  We will just grab McDonald's.
7-We don't DO Thanksgiving.
8-Don't have anyone to take care of my (cat, dog, kid, elderly neighbour,tarantula,etc)
9- I NEED to stay home and watch a football game, paint dry, leaves fall off the trees,etc.
And finally:
10- We really don't like you, but deal with you because we have to, no hard feelings or anything but we would rather douse ourselves in gravy and jump into a pit of angry and hungry rat dogs and scorpions, while doing the jig, naked!